Article by Chadwick:
I went apartment shopping today. I had in previous days researched on the internet and narrowed my prospects down to a promising few. Within the first few hours my hopes were crushed by the reality that my instincts at picking apartments sucked.
I brought along with me a small pad of paper to take notes on. I did this for three reasons: A.)I am very forgetful, B.) I have a bad memory, and C.)I love to repeat information. It was at the third apartment I visited this morning that I was struck by something. My notepad was having a profound impact on the salesmanship of the apartment reps. I would begin writing and suddenly their apathetic transmission became an Atticus Finch-inspired treatise on closet space.
Having been not half as impressed with the last apartment as I was with its employees, I decided it was time to get some lunch. Today’s selection: Instanbul Cafe, a Turkish restaurant (and proudly so). I was greeted as could be expected in any restaurant. Without flare or urgency I was led to my table. Yet as I sat there and began to review my notes I noticed a distinct shift in the service I was given. Disinterested waiters now were sensitive to my every whim in a manner that can only be compared to singing plates in a Disney film.
The notepad’s power was in full sight for me, and all who served me, to see
…and it was glorious.
My mind alowed itself to spill over the possiblities: A crowded restaurant on a Friday night and in walks yours truly.
“It will be 45 mintues to an hour”, she would say in words like bullets. I would give an unimpressed look and let out a subtle and dismayed “hmm” as I pulled out my notepad and began to write.
I would be seated before I could even finish writing, “suckers”.
There are, of course, a few bad situations for using the notepad. Dating, for instance, might bear some unsavory results if one were to conduct table talk like a white house press conference.
I imagine that watching home movies with Roger Ebert might be a little unsettling, but I bet you’ll think twice about the way you light your shot next time.
